Okay, so I dont know what got into me when i woke up this morning but I told myself I needed to do this. I needed to feel as if nothing is lost. Five years have passed since I left America. Five long years. And except from the last year of high school in Sweden I cant say I've experienced that much new. When my trip to America got cancelled last summer i went very sad. I thought I would get over it, but since my economy isnt what it was i have no possibility to go there in the next upcoming years. So I had my chance and God didnt want it to happen. It made me take another direction in my life- move from my mom and dad and get my own place. I cannot see now what that has given me, but I hope I will in a couple of years. I guess that was what felt so good about being in America- i could see and feel my own development in a totally different way from what I can in this present. I am losing my feel of the american language, I dont feel as confident when talking as I once did. That makes me sad too.
I am writing this to all of you Americans who still think of me sometimes. Those of you are the ones who made the biggest impact on me during my stay, and you helped me grow as a person. I learned so much about myself. No money in the world could ever replace all the smiles and all the wonderful experiences I got from my year in America. I love you so much. For all the laughters and tears, for all the special moments you shared with me and for letting me be a part of your life. x
This is to Christy, my mommy, hope you're reading this as well:
You are so special. Never have I met a person who does so much good for others without expecting any in return. You are that kind of person who are worth everything good that life has in store for us. I often speak of you as the person who changed me. I learned to accept, trust and love other people. No person has ever told me that I can do all good I want. That I am strong, talented and beautiful. You told me this- every single day- and I am forever grateful towards you for that. I came as a wreck and left as a star. I have never felt as good as I did when being with my american family. You are my heroes and I know that I will meet you sooner than you think.
There are no words to describe how fantastic and special you are C. You will always be my mommy.